Myths about love

1.True love is love at first sight.

Response: Yes, there are many times I wish that this was true, but it is the physical attraction that is what happens at first sight.

2. When you cannot think of anything else but the person in whom you are interested, that means that you are in love.

Response: Actually, that can be lust as well as love. It takes time to have love mature.

3. Having sex before marriage enhances a relationship and fosters love.

Response: Actually, when that step is taken, it changes the relationship. The persons involved become possessive. There is jealousy, mistrust and anger. With all of these feelings involved, how can you find real love? Friendship is a better direction to go.

4. Lying to each other protects the one we love.

Response: Ummmmm… When you start lying, it is hard to stop. Also, when you are found out, it hurts the one you lied to, therefore it kills the love you are trying to protect.

5. If the one I loved really loves me, they would automatically know what I need and want.

Response: Many years I thought that and found that it was wrong! Communication is the key. We need to speak up and also listen to our companion to make sure that the needs are met.

6. A kiss indicates caring and love.

Response: Most times we kiss because it is fun or stimulating or even expected at the end of a date. Many judge the other person just by how and when they kiss. Ouch!

7. Just because you date a non-member does not mean that you are going to marry one.

Response: You marry the type of people you date. If the non-member does not show interest in your beliefs, walk away. It will create contention in many marriages. I will not say all, I know many marriages that seem to be happy being member/non-member, but after a while, I find that the member is not as happy as they could be. I actually recently married someone who became a member just before we tied the knot. I had to stress with him that he was not to join the church because of my belief, but to join because of his own beliefs.This has made all of the difference in our relationship.

8. When you are really in love, the intensity of the feeling is very high and will stay that way.

Response: Actually, it ebbs and flows. At some points, you will find that it is the honeymoon level and others you will find that you are a roommate. Love needs to be nurtured. It needs to be treated as something special. Help it to grow by remembering to do something about it on a strong level. Flowers, notes, service and remembering to stop and say those special words. A kiss when it is unexpected, a date that is creative all helps to make this grow. Also, remember that we are thinking on a “Forever” level.

Being a friend to the one we love will be the most precious aspect of all.

Here is hoping that we are willing to make changes and are willing to make love grow in our hearts-even today.

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