Romantic love…

Elder Boyd K Packer said, “Romantic love… is not only a part of life, but literally a dominating influence of it. It is deeply and significantly religious. There is no abundant life without it. Indeed, the highest degree of the Celestial Kingdom is unobtainable in the absence of it.”

Is it not wonderful to know that this is a gift that is given from Heavenly Father? This is to be cherished.

I find that this is one of the largest topics that the world focuses on-almost above anything else. The hard part is that the world focuses on the mechanics of making love and what is being searched for is artificial.

I attended a show while in Vegas about a girl who was looking for love. But instead of focusing on the heart and true love, they were focusing on “Showing her assets” and how those assets could be used for power and advantage over a man. I could say that I was shocked, and even 20 years ago, I would normally be, but instead, I was saddened because this is what the world thinks will bring eternal companionship.

Now, do not get me wrong, I truly believe that passion should be a part of a healthy relationship. It should be a factor in a marriage, but only focused on our husband or wife. Adam and Eve were created in a fashion that it would have to take the two of them joining together to be able to create a life. Remember the scripture, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” in Genesis 2:24.

Spencer W. Kimball taught, “The Lord [His plan] required both a man and a woman to reproduce through sexual relations and to also care for, rear, and teach the child gospel truths once he/she was born. This process of reproduction was designed before this world was organized.”  Also, Elder Boyd K. Packer testified, “I want to tell you young people that this power within you is good. It is a gift from God our Father. In the righteous exercise of it as in nothing else we may come close to him.” This means to me that marriage and making love go hand-in-hand. That it is not a dirty, but a wonderful process. We just need to keep everything in order concerning the “when” part. Marriage first, making love second. I know that it is hard to do, but to resist the temptation to enjoy the last part before the first will give us many other gifts.

Let’s see this from the worldly side of things. I will use names that are not the normal ones to protect my friends. I remember being in a car with Joe who was talking to his friend Mark. Mark was being kicked out of his own home by his girlfriend Jill. She was throwing dishes at him. Joe was trying to calm Mark down and when it came to it, what really happened was that Jill caught Mark spending time with Susan to “Get a massage” and was out late that night. After the conversation ended, I talked with Joe about this situation. I asked some very simple questions, but this is the most important one: When did they move in together? 1 week after they met.   It shocked Joe that I even could tell that this was exactly what was destroying their relationship.

When intimacy has been introduced into a relationship, the relationship changes. Instead of growing the love, one or both of the couple becomes possessive and jealous. They have not had time to get to know each other. Anger overcomes love. Hate overcomes joy. And in most cases, the relationship is doomed to end.

My greatest hope is that we support each other and are there for each other when we are walking off of the right path. There is a reason that we have many activities that are focused on groups. If we find that we are crossing a few lines, it is best to be active in crowds instead of being alone together-at least until we get ourselves back under control.

I always hope that if one of my friends sees that I am stepping the wrong direction that they will lovingly remind me so that I can stay clean. One question I always asked was this; “Is what I am doing honoring my future husband? Would he want to be with me if I did something that was wrong and I would have to tell him about?”

I admit that I am a very passionate person, my friends know this. This is why they guide my passion towards service and good things. I am grateful to them for this. I could have walked the wrong direction many times without them.

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